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5 Easy Sex Positions for Parents

September 19, 2017

 

 

Forget the Wheelbarrow, the Reverse Cowgirl and the Upside-down Lotus Blossom.

 

No one with kids has energy for that.

 

Here are some more feasible sex positions to try.

 

The Multitasker

Classic doggy style, but on the kitchen floor. Then you can save time by having sex whilst picking up old Cheerios. 

 

Silent Night

Ramp up the erotic tension by constantly telling your partner to be quiet in case he wakes the baby. 

 

Eyes Wide Shut

Have sex blindfolded. It's not an S&M thing; it's so you don't have to see all the piles of dirty washing or kids' toys. Suddenly finding yourself staring into Iggle Piggle's cold dead eyes can really ruin the moment for you. 

 

Rhythm Method

Worried your partner is going to climax too soon? Make them last longer by singing a rousing verse of Wind the Bobbin Up. 

 

Sexy Buffet

Treat your partner to an erotic feast by covering your naked body with sushi. If you don't have any sushi to hand, try covering your nipples with Mini Babybels and filling your belly button with hummus. It's up to you where you put the breadsticks....

 

This is an extract from the fabulous book - 'SCUMMY MUMMIES' by Ellie Gibson and Helen Thorn.

 

Buy it here; https://www.amazon.co.uk/Scummy-Mummies-Helen-Thorn/dp/1849499616/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1505830116&sr=8-1&keywords=SCUMMY+MUMMIES

 

 

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